Mucho Gusto Colette

Hola Amigos! I have safely arrived home from my travels afar. I have so many stories and pics to share in many blogs to come. However, I first want to share with you the most meaningful part of my journey.

Whether you recognize it or not, something about traveling seems to change your perspective on life. Sometimes it even makes you reevaluate where you are going and who you think you are. Perhaps it's the unfamiliarity of new people and places that gives you a chance to start fresh, or the fact that all your weaknesses and insecurities seem to slap you in the face. Whatever it is, I am addicted to it.

I'm can't say there was one miraculous moment when everything became clear, but rather it was little things here and there that pointed me in the right direction. You see... at some point while I was away, I finally made friends with this amazing girl. I've always known her, but never really liked her. Her name is Colette. You see, friends, for the first time in my life, I can say that I really like being me. And that's a pretty great feeling.

I have never allowed myself to be happy just the way I am. I have always desperately wanted to, believe me I have, but a part of me just wouldn't allow it. I would always tell myself, "If you were just like this, or you weren't so much like that, then you could be happy. But you're not, so you just can't be, and maybe you never will."
I have always tried to be so hard to be "perfect." But 'perfect' by who's standards? Everyone's. Trouble is, everyone's idea of perfect is different. I have lived my life making decisions so carefully based on, "If I say this, or do that, someone might not like it... or someone might thing it's dumb." "If I wear this, someone might think it's ugly." "I better not do that because someone might not like it, or think it's annoying, blah, blah, blah."

But ya know what? That someone can go to hell.
There I said it. Ha! Haha ha!

I feel so refreshingly free! And... happy?
Yeah, I'm happy. :)

I'm going to stop holding myself back. I'm going to stop saying, "I'd like to do this, but I'm not that type of person." or "I don't think I could pull that off."
Don't get me wrong, I understand realistic expectations, but by golly, there are enough voices in this world telling me I am nothing. It's time I started rooting for my own team.

Like I said before, nothing drastic happened while I was in Honduras to produce this change. I know this is something I have been working towards for quite sometime. I think it just gave me the opportunity to finally make a breakthrough.
I am finally allowing myself to find joy in the journey.


And so,

Mucho gusto, Colette
It's a pleasure to meet you.

You've been hiding for far too long.